Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Keegan Olson's Tips for Having Fun at the Dentist.

So I just got home from my dentist appointment and I would like to share with you guys how I make it funner. Also I think that funner should be a real word so I'm gonna use it.

Haters gonna hate.

Okay back to the dentist and fun thing.

Tip #1: Always get your entire mouth frozen.

No matter what you are going to the dentist for, try and get your mouth frozen.

You may be thinking "What???? That's dumb. Getting your mouth frozen is awful!"


When your mouth is frozen it's so much fun to try and communicate with other people. Example: The receptionist gave me my receipt and I attempted to say "Thank You." Instead it came out as "Thaaaaannnnn Ooooo."I thought it was hilarious and I sang along with every song on the drive home.

Also eating and drinking with a frozen mouth is the coolest thing ever! You don't feel the food or drink but you taste it.... It's really weird.

Tip #2: If you have to get a filling, or they're drilling or something like that, stay up all night beforehand and sleep at the dentist.

Dentist chairs are a surprisingly good place to take a nap. There's good neck support, the back angle is terrific, and you can watch T.V. until you fall asleep.

Also the sounds of the drill make your dreams epic.

Today I dreamt that I was a racecar driver and the sounds from the drill were the sounds of my engine. It was awesome!

Tip #3: Be friendly and have a conversation before they stick their fingers in your mouth.

When you're interacting with other human beings it makes any situation much more enjoyable. For instance, today when the dental assistant came in she asked me how I was doing. I said that I was doing quite well, except I was chapped because I was missing waffle wednesday. (Waffle wednesday is exactly what it sounds like, every wednesday me and my cousins/roommates ingest as many waffles as we can before heading to class. It's great) I explained waffle wednesday to her and we started talking about food. We talked about chicken and waffles, and whether you put the chicken on the waffles or if you eat them separately, then she told me to try chicken nuggets dipped in honey sauce. Sounds pretty good. Then I told her about dipping fries in frosty and how that is actually the most delicious, yet unexpected, combos in the world.

Because we had a little bit of a "friendship" I felt more comfortable with her putting her fingers in my mouth.

Wait... that sounds really creepy.....

Meh whatever. I slept through it anyways.

SIDENOTE: My jaw and lips feel HUGE! I wonder if this is what it feels like to be obese? Probably not. I really wish that I had a bunch of that freezing stuff and I could just freeze my mouth whenever I wanted.... It's so fun.

I think that's all I want to say for today...

Later Internet.

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